I have to admit that I don’t really get that Friday feeling anymore. Well not the one that I had for almost 20 years. How many of you can relate to desperately clawing your way towards the weekend? The clock practically going backwards and mocking you with each tick as you count down to getting your freedom back for 48 hours. Its been yet another complete ball ache of a week since 9:05am on Monday. Then finally plodding out of the office because the skipping you would love to do would require energy that you simply don’t have. I don’t miss that feeling at all.
I thought it would forever be a part of my life, and then of course the feeling of dread about Monday would kick in about 3pm on Saturday. Two years ago I would have completely buried my head in the sand about this, instead choosing to go out and spend money I didn’t really have on stuff that I didn’t really need, and drinking a bit too much wine. I was in denial. Because, everyone is miserable at work right? And lets not forget, that misery loves company.
It was no way to live, and if you are reading this feeling hopeless and stuck, I promise you that you don’t have to stay where you are, you really don’t. All you need is to believe that you are capable of real change, and are willing to try. That niggle isn’t going to go away, you can’t keep papering over it and pretending its not there.
Friday feeling for me now is very different I never watch the clock now, and I don’t have a hideous commute to face either. Friday now is knowing that I get a solid 48 hours with my husband and son, and that we can both clock off early and take our little dude to the beach for a paddle and some fish and chips. There wont be any Saturday dread ruining my fun either.
If you’re thinking “But Rachel, you don’t get it, thats just not possible for me, I’m stuck”, then I would happily challenge you and say that I don’t believe that at all. You just haven’t known anything different up to this point, but nothing is concrete, and if you know that you don’t want to wake up at 65 having made someone else dreams come true and missing out on yours, then its time to act.
Believe me when I say that in early 2016 I was as stuck as stuck could be or so I thought. Too old to change, didn’t know what I wanted to do. Could I even afford it? What would people think? Turns out it was all bullshit. My brain was just trying to keep me safe.
We are all capable of deciding on our path and choosing to do something differently. Those strengths are usually buried under a pile of unhelpful limits we’ve placed upon ourselves, and stories which simply aren’t true.
If you’re at the point where you are ready to love your work and want to go for it, then I would love to hear from you. Stop waiting for your life to start.