Hi, I’m Rachel Martin, and I am a Career Change & Fulfillment Coach. I’m here to help you find joy in the work that you do. Yes, I know, it sounds like a trick, but its really not.
You see, I used to sit at a desk in London and metaphorically bang my head against it. I used to commute a minimum of 3 hours a day in a metal tube with hundreds of other miserable looking people. I used to cry in the toilets – A LOT. I’m not really sure how it happened, but straight out of college I fell into an unhealthy relationship with the inside of an office, and it took me 20 years to leave it.
I was never meant for that space, but a lack of self belief, encouragement, and clarity meant that I just drifted there. I felt caged, stifled and as though it was all wrong. But, I didn’t have the strength or courage to even try to pull myself out of it. I guess I was wooed by the security of it all, by the notion of being important for a change. Something that had been drastically missing from my life up to that point. I was part of something, I had a purpose. Again, something that I felt I had lacked until that point.
But, it was all a lie, that office wasn’t who it portrayed itself to be. In fact no office I ever met has ticked the boxes it promised to. Over the years I became resentful, and angry. I was trapped in a meaningless job and couldn’t see a way out. Every time I thought about it there would be a little pay rise, or once a year a shiny bonus. Those gestures were enough to keep me there. Plus everyone else appeared to love the office. So I dismissed my true feelings as silly, and buried my head in yet more monotonous paperwork.
Yet there was a niggle, and it was getting more uncomfortable. The money, plush surroundings and a London postcode were really losing their shine. I knew something had to change, and that something was me. So in early 2016, I sought out a Life Coach, I mean it took me an age to actually take the plunge. After all it was a scary prospect to start picking apart the last two decades of my life with a stranger. The reality though was completely different.
My Coach was a ballsy northerner, with wild curly hair like me, and a potty mouth, also like me. She felt like home. A person who I could let the real me be seen by without any fear of judgement. Our coaching sessions were the highlight of my fortnight and session by session I felt things shifting, it felt like my mind was losing weight. I was unearthing the woman that I was always meant to be. It wasn’t so much about becoming her, but peeling back the layers of stories and beliefs that were keeping her hidden away and letting her out into the light.
I know its really hard to look at your stuff, yet I know its harder to stay in a career or job that’s not right for you. It is my unshakeable belief that we are capable of more than we ever imagined, and that its never too late to start walking a different path. In those minutes before you fall asleep at night and the world is dark and quiet, I know what you are thinking “I just dont know what to do”.
Life is a tricky bugger, and none of us move through it unscathed, unless of course we are hiding away so much that we are merely existing and not really living. When I hear women describe their work as “okay” or “fine” it makes my heart break. Okay is a perfectly good way to describe last nights spag bol. Fine is an appropriate response when someone asks how you are a week after your cat died. Those words have no place describing what you spend a third of your life doing.
Don’t get me wrong, there will always be days that dont go feel so great from time to time. But, there is a big difference between those days, and the endless days, weeks, months where you wish you could just run away from it all and never see the inside of an office again.
I get massively pissed off that even now its seen as some kind of weakness to admit that your life isn’t looking and feeling how you’d like it to. The opposite is true. Its bloody amazing to get to that point, to know that you are done with how things have been and are ready to step up and step into who you were always meant to be. I know that the only way to change something is to go through it. You can’t go round, and you cant go back. The “through” is scary, but everything I have learned about myself over my nearly 40 years points to one thing. Our only limit is the one we set for ourselves. I have never regretted doing anything that scared me, which says to me that fear is a liar.
What is it lying to you about?